We stumbled upon a fun playground in North East last night.

We had taken the girls for a walk at the Eaton Reservoir in North East, stopped in town to pick up a quick dinner from Subway and were going to eat in Gibson Park when we decided to see if there was a nearby playground where the kids could play after we ate.

My husband remembered an old wooden park on the N.E. school campus, so we cruised over & were surprised to find a modern, composite park. It was fairly large too -- with stuff for kids of every ability. There are even full body swings that I assume are for physcially-challenged children.

We took at seat at the blue composite plastic picnic table and made a fruitless effort to make the kids sit and eat. But, they couldn't contain their excitement and quickly bolted to go explore the playground equipment.

There were all kinds of slides -- including one that was a series of rollers. Sliding down that was a whole new experience! There was a "rock wall," several "bumpy" slides and tons of swings. I think we had as much fun as the kids.

What the park didn't have was any other children. Which, is not suprising. Whenever I take the kids to any park -- at any time of day -- we are frequently the only people there. There were a few people there when we go there, but they left shortly after and we had the entire park to ourselves (it was about 7:15 or so) -- which was nice and yet, sort of disheartening because more kids need to be running around on playgrounds instead of sitting in front of television and computer screens.

One of the difficult things about having done special sections for nearly 8 years now is that I sometimes struggle to come up with fresh content ideas. Especially when we do the section twice a year -- like Bridal.

The deadline is looming in a few weeks for our September Bridal Guide and I still haven't come up with a cool cover story.

It seems I've done it all: Heirloom dresses, wedding traditions and superstitions, disaster stories, destination weddings, second weddings, blended family weddings, weddings on the cheap, wedding receptions, wedding transportation, wedding entertainment ....

So, I'm reaching out to you. Do you have any great wedding story ideas? Have you been to a wedding where they've done something unusual? Have you noticed a trend we should highlight? Are you a recent bride -- or a current bride-to-be -- who has come up against something you need help with? Do you have any ideas for a cool cover story?

If so, email me at heather.cass@timesnews.com -- if I use your idea, I will give you credit in the section!

Save me -- please -- or we may end up doing something on how to carve your own centerpieces out of the abundance of zucchini in your summer garden.

You think I'm kidding?

BTW -- the story cannot be about a specific retail outlet or wedding service business -- as in "do a story about how XYZ Bridal Shop is locally owned and has been in business for 35 years" -- it has to be a general interest story about weddings or marriage.

When I go for a walk in the woods, I don't bother with bug repellant. I don't need to because I have a bug magnet -- my husband. The biting insects see/sense him coming a mile away and ring the dinner bell. "Fresh, A- blood....come'n get it!"

I always feel sorry for him as the girls and I walk alongside him -- seemingly invisible to the blood-suckers. Poor Dan usually spends our entire walk slapping at deer flies, mosquitos and various other biting, flying insects. He resembles Pig Pen from the Peanuts comic strip with all these bugs buzzing around his head. I can't help but chuckle at the site. He is never amused.

Turns out there may be a reason they love my husband -- he smells manly. At least that's what reasearchers are saying about those most-annoying of summertime pests -- mosquitos. They've found that, indeed, some people are more attractive to mosquitos -- particularly those with "high concentrations of steroids or cholesterol on their skin surface." Now, I don't know about steroids -- my husband's no muscle-head, buff, gym jock, but....

This article was on AOL's homepage a day or two ago & I found it really interesting. You can read it here: http://aolsvc.health.webmd.aol.com/content/Article/90/100719.htm?pagenumber
=1 (you may have to copy & paste into your browser).

So do you think Barry Bonds is one giant walking mosquito bite?

A full day at Waldameer with the kids and three hundred co-workers has left me with a serious case of dragon butt today (you know, my butt is draggin').

It was all I could do to stay awake while I waited for the red lights on the way to work today. Fortunately, there are lots of lights on 12th street (never did I think that would be a good thing) that allowed me to get at least a 10 minute nap in during my commute.

I'm not normally here on Mondays -- I work a four-day, 10-hour schedule (Tues-Fri) which means I don't normally "do" Mondays and now I remember why. Mondays suck.

I forgot I had to work today until we got home from Waldameer last night at 8:30 p.m. (I have this Thursday & Friday off, so I'm "unflexed" this week). I had to scramble last night to get everything done for this morning -- lay out my work clothes, running clothes and the girls' clothes, pack lunches, pack the swim lesson bags, round up the library books that need returned today and pack my work bag.

Then, of course, there's all the evening household stuff that I needed to do before bed: water all the container plants (the ones I swear each year I won't plant next year because it's such a pain to water them every day), fill the oriel and hummingbird feeders, sweep the kitchen floors, unpack the giant bag we took to Waldameer & spread out all the suits and towels to dry, do the dishes, switch the laundry ....

All this after a 8.5 mile morning run and 6 hours of running around Waldameer with the kids.

I fell into bed exausted at 11 p.m.

But, I'm not complaining.

I have a full life, yes. But, it's a blessed life. I work for a good company that is generous enough to treat hundreds of employees and their families to a day of fun at Waldameer (not to mention free lunch). I have two healthy kids who are capable of running and riding and sliding for hours on end. I have a house to keep clean and a husband who helps me do so.

Today is the first of the 8 Great Tuesday concerts at Liberty Park. I'm ashamed to say that I have never made it to one of these concerts (in past years) yet. My girlfriends all tell me the concerts are a blast. The girls are older -- and more controllable now -- so I am determined to get our family to at least one of these concerts this year.

Word has it parking can be a problem. Those in the know advise taking advantage of the free shuttle on the bayfront route (park at Library, Intermodel building, etc.).

Concerts start at 6:30 and go until 9:30 and they're FREE. The beer and concessions, however, are not...so you may want to bring a few bucks.

Scheduled to perform tonight are the Gem City All Stars.

Here's the rest of the lineup:

July 18th
Jakes Blues
Blue Fire

July 25th
Yardbirds

August 1st
Key West Express

August 8th
Jefferson Starship/Jefferson Airplane
"Galactic Reunion Tour 2006"

August 15th
Dave Stevens Big Band

August 22nd
The Fabulous Gunslingers

August 29th
Rick Derringer

I was planning my children’s birthday parties before they were even conceived. I did the math and knew I had to get pregnant in the fall if I wanted summer babies. And, I wanted summer babies so that we could have the quintessential summer birthday parties — outdoors. I had visions of opening presents on a blanket spread on the lawn, a pool full of kids in arm floaties and goggles, a pinata hanging from the old maple tree, horsehoes clinking, grill sizzling with hot dogs.

Dan and I both come from families of five and all but one of our siblings live in town. There are 30 people in our immediate family. Add in some close aunts, uncles, cousins and family friends and you’ve got 50 people. Which is exactly many are invited to Casa Cass on Friday night for our daughters’ birthday party. (You see now why it was so important for me to shoot for summer birthdays — imagine 50 people in your house in February -- my sister-in-law, Cindy, can tell you all about it).

Yes, I succeeding in sticking to the schedule and giving birth to summer babies. Both of my daughters were born in July and their birthdays are just 12 days apart. Which means, they share one big birthday party. This joint party is easier on them (no squabbling or tears over one getting gifts and the other sister not getting gifts), our family (they only have to come to one party) and me (the one who does all -- OK, most of -- the work).

My husband is the only one who thinks we should have two separate parties -- but that's because my husband "Good Time Dan" loves a party. They're great fun for him because his entire pre-party preparation consists of mowing the lawn and buying the beer.

I, however, have been shopping since last weekend and I’m still not done — food, cake, presents, party favors, decorations, princess crowns, ice cream, balloons — it’s ridiculous, really. I became overwhelmed at Party City last night trying to choose favors for each kid (boys and girls from ages 10 to 4 mos.) and decided to forgo favors altogether. And, once I went down that road, it was easy to quickly cast aside the pinata and party games too — both would just mean more expense and more shopping. Normally I'm a gal who likes shopping, but not for hot dog buns, napkins, plastic cutlery and condiments.

So, I took tomorrow and Friday off to finish party preparations and clean the house. I've got princess dresses to press, pool floats to blow up, veggies to chop, a turkey to smoke, chocolate-covered pretzel rods to make and presents to wrap -- and a day-and-a-half to pull it all together.

Wheewww...glad that birthday party is behind me now. I forgot that it takes just as much work after the party as it does before. There's the clean-up, opening all the presents (what kind of joy do toy companies get out of wiring/taping every single item to the box?), dealing with overly-tired kids and finding a place for all the new toys.

The girls, my husband and I took a much-needed lazy day yesterday -- we did no work (except for putting some toys together) -- just swam and lounged poolside all day. The overachiever in me felt guilty for "wasting" an entire day, but the burnt-out Mommy in me appreciated the break.

Speaking of breaks (how do you like that transition?) -- I caught a break on the girls' birthday cakes this year. I gripe about the cost of their cakes each year. I like to get them each their own -- which is nice because then I can get one white cake & one chocolate. In past years, this has cost me as much as $40 for cakes.

This year, I spent $26.

I found these cute cupcake cakes at Wal-Mart -- availabe in DISNEY designs (yes, licensed designs) for just $12.98. There are 24 cupcakes in each cake and you have the choice of cake and frosting type.

Here's Kelly's (pink, of course):
Image

And, Lauren's (Ariel from the Little Mermaid):

Image

They are available in all kinds of different designs and shapes -- there are even cute adult designs.

They were a real hit at the girls' party.

I've am blessed to have never dealt with the kiddie bedtime blues that most parents deal with.

I have my husband to thank for that.

From the time my firstborn was a few months old, he insisted we put her to sleep in her crib while she was drowsy. I was inclined to cradle my newborn and rock her teeny body to bed night after night, but big bad Daddy would come along and take her out of my arms before she was fully asleep and lay her down gently in her crib to fall asleep on her own.

It worked.

I have amazing sleepers. Bedtime is not a problem in our house. Now...let me clarify that they don't cheerfully march up to bed, but they don't cry, whine, cause a scene, wail on the floor or otherwise freak out. They sleep in their own beds and they stay there all night. We help them brush their teeth, read them a story, shut off the lights, close the door and that's it.

Usually.

Every once in a while, we'll end up with a kid in our bed -- like if they had a bad dream or there was a loud thunderstorm, or they are sick. I love my girls, but I cannot stand sleeping with them. Hell, I can barely tolerate sharing sleeping space with my husband let alone a toddler that seems to be all knees and elbows poking me all night long.

Last night, the little one (3yo) seemed to have a case of insomnia; she just couldn't sleep. So, of course, she came to have a party in our bed.

I'm all for a party, but not at 3 a.m., not when I have to get up and run at 5 a.m. and not when I'm coming off five days of vacation. But, I begrudgingly moved over and was silently annoyed for a good half hour as she shifted all around, kicking and elbowing me.

I was contemplating a move to the couch, when it occured to me that all I needed to do was put my head at the foot of the bed -- because her little limbs can't reach that far. I grabbed my pillow, flipped around, and slept blissfully the rest of the night.

So, next time you find yourself sleeping triple, just put your head where your feet go and let your little one cuddle up to your calves.

Her Times is now an official award-winning publication.

Her Times Magazine was recently awarded third place in the Inland Press/Newspaper Special Sections Network's annual Great Idea Contest in the category of Family/Youth.

This is an annual contest in which newspapers submit their best special sections and new revenue ideas. Newspapers from across the U.S., as well as Canada and Mexico, take part in the contest which has three circulation divisions (so that newspapers compete with other newspapers of their size -- this prevents The Journal Times in Racine, WI from having to compete with the Dallas Morning News). There were 607 entries in this year's contest and Her Times Magazine was one of the winners.

I'd be a liar if I said I wasn't disappointed we didn't get first place. I wanted first. And, I think we deserved first. I have yet to see the competition, though. I'll have that opportunity in a few weeks when I travel to the Windy Cindy for the annual Special Sections Contest at which time representatives from hundreds of newspapers converge to share ideas and improve our current products.

It's always a great conference and I enjoy attending it (and it's not just because I enjoy three kid-free "me" days or because of the marvelous "magnificent mile" shopping...or even that great running trail along the Lake). I always come home with great ideas, a box full of sections from other newspapers, a bunch of new contacts and a renewed enthusiasm for my job.

The awards banquet is always held on the first night and I'll be there to pick up our award. The next two days I'll be picking up ideas.

And, next year, I plan on picking up gold.

You can see a complete list of winners here: http://www.inlandpress.org/Main.asp?SectionID=47&SubSectionID=184&ArticleID=1
150

The older my daughters get the harder I find it to navigate the milestones they keep reaching. Much as I want to rejoice and cheer and encourage them and their newfound skills and independence (and I do), I also want to scream "Stop it. Just stop growing up so fast. I'm not ready for this. Get back in my arms! Where have my babies gone?"

We often take walks in the evening. It used to be just me and the dog (and my growing belly). Then, it was me pushing infant Kelly in the big travel stroller. Then, Lauren came along and I'd carry her in the front pack (or backpack) and push Kelly. When Lauren was old enough, I started pushing them both in a double stroller. A year or so later, we started using the wagon.

Last week, as I struggled to pull 70 lbs. worth of kids up a hill in a wagon, I realized that they had even outgrown the wagon.

Not a moment too soon, the girls both got "big girl" bikes (complete with training wheels, bells, streamers and, of course, helmets) for their birthday last weekend.

Monday I got the bright idea to let my new bikers hit the open road and peddle down the street as Dan and I trotted alongside, compulsively swiveling our heads to watch for oncoming cars as we gently steered them time and again to the side of the road.

With the ding, ding, ding of the Disney Princess bells and the clack, clack, clack of the training wheels on our tar and chip road, I realized we rolled into yet another major milestone. No longer will those girls be content to sit in a stroller or wagon.

Two neighbor ladies who walk together every night came by and stopped to wonder at how quickly the girls had grown. "It seems like just yesterday we saw you walking the dog with your little pregnant belly (referring to my first pregnancy) and now, look at them riding their own bikes!"

"I know," I said as I felt a lump rise in my throat and the tears begin to well up in my eyes as I stumbled over another milestone.

In case you've missed the radio commercials, the billboards, the cover story on yesterday's Showcase magazine in the Erie Times-News -- this weekend is the Key West Phest at Liberty Park.

I've never been because (I believe) it was always the weekend of Discover Presque Isle, but our family calendar is clear this Saturday and I'm thinking of taking the kids down to check it out. Margaritas, loud flowered shirts, sun, shimmering water, fun music and people everywhere celebrating the good life -- what's not to love?

Well, hate to spoil the fun, but those yummy frozen margaritas pack anywhere from 250 to 500 calories. If you're consuming 2,000 a day (less, actually, for most women) -- one margarita can be 1/4 of your days caloric allotment.

I know ... I know... girls (and guys) just want to have fun. Well, just so happens in my "inbox" yesterday I found this cool recipe from the ladies at HungryGirl.com for a 100-calorie margarita. So, in honor of this weekend's parrothead party, why not whip up a batch and save yourself 400 calories?

HG's Magical 100-Calorie Margarita
Ingredients:
6 oz. Sierra Mist Free (or Sprite Zero, or your other fave no-cal lemon-lime soda)
*1 shot of tequila (1.5 oz.)
1 packet **Crystal Light on the Go Lemonade (you may use 1/2 of the packet if you don't want your drink as intensely sweet)
2 tbsp. lime juice from concentrate (or fresh-squeezed lime juice)

Directions:
Mix all ingredients together. Pour over 1 cup of crushed ice. Enjoy.

*You can also make your margarita alcohol-free. This recipe, without tequila, contains just 10 calories (5 calories if you use only half of the Crystal Light packet).

**1 tsp. Crystal Light Lemonade drink mix may be substituted.

Girlfriend Jenn & I hit the open road at 9 a.m. Sunday for the ultimate girls' day (and night) out -- the big Steelers Championship Celebration Concert in Pittsburgh with Nickelback and Bon Jovi performing.
Jenn and I love the Steelers and Nickelback. And, though neither of us are rabid Bon Jovi fans, we can't help but be nostalgic about them as both of us were young tweens with stonewashed mini skirts and feathered hair (held perfectly in place with a can of Aqua Net hairspray) when we saw them perform at Erie's Veteran's Stadium in the early 80s. If nothing else, he makes us feel young again.

The concert didn't start until 6 p.m., but we had figured in several hours of shopping at Grove City (c'mon, what woman can drive PAST those outlet stores? ) and a few more hours of tailgating near Heinz Field. Both were good uses of our time. We scooped up major bargains at Grove City and had more bags than we could carry back to the car when we left at 1 p.m.

I had never been to Heinz Field before, but it was certainly easy to find. We were nervous about finding somewhere to park and ended up stopping in the first lot we found near the stadium because it was filled with black-and-gold-clad people hauling out grills and breaking out coolers full of beer. I had been warned that parking was expensive near the stadium, so I was prepared to fork over the $25 parking fee. In the end, it was worth the price of admission just to watch these people. Jen & I had brought a couple of chairs, a cooler of Smirnoffs and a few bags of chips -- but the people around us had taken it to a whole new level -- we're talking full-size grills, inflatable pools, beanbag toss games, picnic tables. It was one big party in the parking lot.

One problem...no porta potty. Luckily, there was a nearby sports bar. At first, we balked at cover charge. A few drinks later, it was looking like a bargain as we waited in line filled with lots of other women who, like us, were perfectly happy to pay for potty privileges.

Over to the stadium around 5 p.m. -- no problems getting in, but we are both 5 feet tall and, so, couldn't see anything going on in the "Great Hall" where I think they were doing some sort of Steelers presentations. We shrugged and headed to find ourselves some overpriced concert t-shirts and beers. Scored both pretty quickly and found our floor seats in the 32nd row, which were...surprisingly great. That is surely the last time I'll ever sit on the 50-yard-line at Heinz Field.

Nickelback started promptly at 6:15 p.m. and they rocked and rocked and rocked ... and left us both wanting more. The venue -- Heinz Field -- was great, but it was still light out and, being that it was outdoors, you didn't get that great chest-thumping reverberation that lets you feel the music through your whole body like you do indoors. We missed that.

A friend and co-worker, Jocelyn Papesch, got some Fab photos. Here's a great one of the Nickelback gang & one of just Chad:

Image

Image

After Nickelback, they did a Steelers Championship presentation. It was highly disappointing in my eyes. There were no Rooneys, no Ben, no Bus, no Cowher. They did bring out some of the other coaches and a few players -- most notably kicker, Jeff Reed, backup QB Charlie Batch and Superbowl MVP -- Hines Ward -- who was clutching the Superbowl trophy. Then, they showed a highlights reel that made me cry (but, I'm blaming that on the beer).

Bon Jovi took stage around 8 or 8:30 p.m. and he did not disappoint -- playing some of the oldies but goodies like "Runaway," "Living on a Prayer," "Wanted Dead or Alive," and, of course, "You Give Love a Bad Name." He did seem to play a lot of unfamiliar tunes too -- perhaps it was the newer stuff, I don't know.

Here's another pix from Jocelyn of Jon.
Image

We ended up abandoning our seats during Bon Jovi and dancing just behind the seats. It was cooler there and we could dance and wave our arms over our head without the danger of elbowing the guy behind us or spilling someone else's beer.

We left while Bon Jovi was singing an encore because we wanted to get home -- and we're old and tired middle-aged mommies who aren't used to staying up until 11 p.m. We practically ran back to the car, got turned around and were near the front of the line when it got jammed with 65,000 other people trying to leave. In the end, though, we only waited about 1/2 hour to 45 minutes before we got out on the open road.

Then it was two hours in the car back to Erie. Ugh. We stopped for some disgusting coffee at one of the travel stops as ALL of the exits looked abandoned and desolate (where are all the convenience stores between Pittsburgh and Erie anyway? Haven't they ever heard of Sheetz, GetGo or 7-11? )

Got home around 1:30 a.m. and dragged our butts and shopping bags out of the car.

All in all -- it was a great time, but between the shopping, the shouting, the dancing and the driving, Jenn and I both needed the entire next day to recover. At 30-something, it's apparent we may want to be rockstars, but we can no longer party like them.

Did you go? What did you think? What was your experience like? Post your comments below!

Here at the Times we get awards for passing milestones in our service to the company. They go in five-year intervals and, the more years you have in at the company, the more elaborate the gift. For my five-year anniversary, I selected a really cool onxy and silver bracelet that I wear frequently. I'm approaching my 10-year anniversary this December and I'm already eyeing up the company-sponsored "frosting" hanging on the wrists, fingers, necks and earlobes of my coworkers (most of the women chose jewelry).

Yesterday, I passed my five-year service anniversary as a mommy when my oldest child, Kelly, turned 5.

And, well ... I'm still waiting for someone to show me a catalog of gifts I get to pick from for my years of dedicated service to this child (and her sister).

No one was handing out awards at home last night -- no diamond pendants, no shiny earrings, no fancy watches came my way.

What I got, when I walked in the door, was a cranky birthday girl crying on the naughty stool -- serving time for whacking her sister over some My Little Pony property dispute. (Dan hated having to put Kelly on the naughty stool on her birthday, but hitting is a major violation of the house rules -- birthday or no birthday, punishment is certain and swift).

Unfortunately, this little episode set the tone for a not-so-fun birthday night. Because, as any mommy knows, once the whine train leaves the station with a kid on board, there's no stopping it -- it just gains momentum until you finally park their butt in bed.

I did my best to cheer her, but even the little chocolate birthday cake I picked up on the way home wasn't scratching her tough exterior. And, besides, it was now after 7 p.m. and with bedtime at 8:30 p.m., our entertainment choices were limited.

Want to go swimming? (usually a surefire, resounding "yes" ) No.

Bike ride? No.

Trampoline? No.

In the end, we all split up and did our own thing. Dan went for a run, the girls put in a Bear In the Big Blue House Video and I took an evening nap.

That nap was better than any jewelry.

And having the privledge of being a mommy for the past five years is reward in and of itself.

Even when they are crabby birthday girls.

I'm currently hot and heavy into editing our next issue of Her Times -- pubs. Aug. 27 (theme is "It's Getting Hot in Here." Yesterday was the advertising deadline so now the layout work begins in earnest. As I work on the pages, I search for art and other cool products/Web sites and bits of information to enhance the articles and page layouts. This means a fair amount of Web surfing.

I always feel guilty when a coworker sees me clicking around OldNavy.com or Nordstroms.com -- I want to say "no, really, I"m not shopping....I'm doing research." Anticipating their scoffs, I say nothing. Let them think what they like. Cyber browsing is one of the perks of editing a woman's magazine.

So, all that said... let me share a couple of the coolest women's things I've found recently that I cannot fit into the magazine (well, we're giving away one of the last items, but...).

www.brastraps.com -- I love those trendy spaghetti strap tanks (Bodyshapers), but that sorry piece of cloth they try to pass off as a "built-in" bra is no match for my post-baby breasts. I wouldn't dream of going without a bra at any time, any where, for any reason, but I always hate letting my bra straps show when I wore one of my tanks (and, we all know that strapless bras are a joke). This site offers fancy straps that make it COOL to leave your straps hanging out!

www.pinktoolbelt.com -- I want one of these toolbelts just because they are so darn cute. And, they're in my favorite chick color -- hot pink. Yes, yes, it's a little stereotypical, I know. And, they're a bit pricey, but no more so than a regular toolbelt. The gloves are cute, too. Those are SO going on my Christmas list this year.

www.littlepinktoolkit.com -- This site offers a pink 10-piece tool set complete with a cool leather storage bag that looks like a purse. Again, it's a bit pricey, but with 10 tools, it's worth the money. We are actually going to be giving one of these away in the August issue of Her Times. Bonus: they say a portion of the proceeds go to breast cancer research.

OK ...I gotta run, I have more shopping ... er, editing to do.

I've long had a disdain for air conditioning. I'm sure it started when I was a teen and my parents splurged on central air for our house. The vent in my room was right by my bed and I woke up most mornings with a sore throat. I thought my parents kept it too cold and would complain bittery all summer. At night, I usually locked my door and threw open my windows to let the warm summer air drift in (Oh..how my Dad would kill me if he knew I did that -- letting his hard-earned cooling dollars go flying out the window).

I don't ever use the A.C. in my car and when we gutted and renovated our house, we never bothered installing a central air. My husband -- the wishful thinker -- has the house all ready for central air (pipes...or whatever it requires), we just never bought a unit (much like he installed cable wires throughout the house -- as if I might give in and order cable).

I've just never seen much need for A.C. -- our house is kept cool by nature's air conditioners -- lots of big old, leafy trees. And, if we do get too hot, relief (our pool) is just 10 feet from the back door.

But, alas, today I am wishing I had A.C. because I now have to go downstairs and can salsa for a story in the upcoming edition of Her Times Magazine. Simmering vats of salsa and stockpots full of boiling water are in my future on this 90-some degree day. Ugh. I'm sweating just thinking about it.

Do you see what lengths I go to for you my dear readers?

Canning on a 90-degree day.

I'm seriously considering packing up my gear and taking everything over to the artic zone and heating up my parents' igloo.

Or jumping in the pool and canning the story altogether.