From my Wild Words from Wild Women desk calendar:

"Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn't have to hear about all the men she could've married, and she didn't have to hear about the way his mother cooked." -- Kimberly Broyles, humor monger.

Last night, I got together with some running friends for some food, drink and lots of laughs. We are an informal group of fun-loving, wine-loving, fitness-minded women ranging in age from 35 (I'm the baby of the group) to 60+. We call our little "club" the Whine and Wine Club.

Driving to my gourmet chef friend's beautiful farmhouse in the country where the Whiners were gathering I told myself I wasn't going to swear, or drink too much, or eat too much, or laugh too loud, or talk too much.

I failed on all accounts.

It's just who I am. I like to drink. I like to eat. I swear like a sailor. I love to laugh. And, God knows, I love to talk.

Normally I'd have woken up today feeling bad about myself and feeling guilty about last night. Guilty because I ate lots of delicious (and surely not low-fat) food. Guilty that I swilled too much good wine (ugh...200 calories a glass). Guilty that I dominated too much of the conversation time (do I think the world revolves around me? Do I think I'm that fascinating?) . Guilty that I laughed too loud (and surely showed everyone my imperfect teeth and many fillings). Guilty that I said the "f" word (how unsophisticated and vulgar).

Go ahead...giggle at my negative self-talk...but, ladies, you know how we think and you know I speak the truth.

But, I've decided to give up feeling guilty about things that make me feel good. Seriously...why should we feel guilty for enjoying incredible food, sweet wine, good friends and well-placed swear word? Why should I let my imperfect teeth stop me from throwing back my head and laughing out loud? How stupid is that?

Have you ever chosen not to be friends with someone because they don't wear designer clothes? Do you look at your friends and see imperfections? Or, do you see the unique things about them that make them interesting and beautiful to you (like a raucous laugh, a crooked tooth or a hole in the armpit of their sweater)?

Frankly, my friends must kinda like who I am because they keep inviting me back -- imperfections and all.

My new lease on a guilt-free life comes about after having just editing a story for our October issue of Her Times. Our theme is "I Quit!" and one of our stories, "Guilty as charged: How to quit guilt," is all about letting go of the guilt that holds you back and occupies your mind with useless garbage (when you could be doing something great with your mind like...reading a book, or writing a book, or planning a vacation, or solving a Suduko puzzle).

Letting go of the negative self-talk and guilt that we women tend to heap on ourselves starts with accepting yourself for who you are and refusing to buy into the messages telling us that anything less than perfection is something to be ashamed of.

Sometimes I eat too much, I drink too much, I laugh too loud and, I talk too much.

And, damn, do I have a good time doing it.

Last night, the husband and I were rushing around the house trying to get dinner dishes cleaned up and two girls dressed and into the car for 6 p.m. swim classes.

The girls have a tendency (like most kids) to leave their things lying around wherever they drop them. My husband, exasperated from picking up sneakers, coats, backpacks and other toys dropped by the door, said "Wouldn't it be nice if you could just leave your stuff lying all over the place and know someone else will take care of it?"

I said, "No comment."
(from the woman who picks up after the husband who leaves his hats on the table, his watch outside, his water bottles all over the house, his socks on the side of the bed, his ....

Welcome to my world, Dan.

And, yes, it would be nice.

Talk is swirling that John Cusack's role in "Grace is Gone" -- to be released Dec. 7 -- could be the breakout performance that leads to his first Oscar nomination. Certainly, he's not exactly a "hottie" in this role, but it looks to be a great (albeit weepy..bring your tissues!) movie.

Check out this trailer.

He has another movie opening this weekend -- Martian Child. It hasn't gotten great reviews. But, I don't care, I'll still fork over cash to see him (yup, I won't even wait for it to come to the dollar theater). But, then, I'd pay $10 to watch him paint a house, or do laundry or whatever, so....

This is pretty cool: Claytopia -- Erie's only paint-your-own-pottery place is offering a twist on the traditional holiday party

Bring your group of more than 10 and each person can choose a mug, pencil holder or salad plate for just $10 per person. (all materials, glazing and firing are included). The best part -- you can bring your own food and drinks (or have it catered).

How fun would that be? Much better than dinner at some stuffy restaurant!

I painted a plate last week at Claytopia for Thanksgiving using the girls' hands to make two turkeys. I can't wait to see how it turned out!

There was an interesting editorial in the Erie Times-News today by Kathleen Parker about Hillary Clinton. Now, far be it for me to agree with a conservative columnist, but...on this topic...the woman speaks the truth.

The gist of the editorial is that by American women will not tolerate people attacking Hillary on a personal level. Say what you want about her credentials, call her out on her voting record, criticize her policies, but when you start commenting on her appearance and scrutinizing her haircut and judging how she handled her marriage -- you are in dangerous waters.

" But let men criticize Clinton personally and a funny thing happens. Contaminating the air is a slight whiff of misogyny that women recognize and recoil against. When men speak derogatorily about Clinton's looks, all women feel a little bit wounded. What woman can withstand such scrutiny, after all?"

It's official, I'm old. These words came out of my mouth when I was telling a friend about my niece's boyfriend, "He's got this hair that hangs in his face and I just want to say -- 'get a haircut, I can't even see your face' I don't know what it is with kids and their hair today -- they just let it hang there."

I actually said those words which is quite hypocritical of me considering I was a product of the '80s when every teenager had big, scary hair that was curled, sprayed, gelled and moussed into all kinds of unnatural formations.

There was an interesting editorial by Suzanne Fields on the op-ed page today -- "Women just don't need Mr. Fix-It."

I don't necessarily agree or disagree with Field's points, I just think she raises some interesting observations -- particularly that "Men and women are finding ways not to depend on each other."

Why is he laughing? Because I told him that I want to run up to Borders tonight to take advantage of my rewards coupon to buy the 25th Anniversary edition of Michael Jackson's Thriller.

Sure, he's nothing but a freak show now, but 25 years ago Michael was the man and everyone had Thriller -- on vinyl, of course. (And everyone COOL had a zippered shirt or jacket just like Mike's).

Check out this blog where there is a debate raging as to which was the better Michael Jackson album -- Thriller or Off the Wall.

So, my husband can laugh all he wants, but who can blame a 36-year-old woman for wanting to revel in the good old days -- back when I was a P.Y.T.?

And, this is a man, by the way, who was recently busted by a co-worker dancing on the job site to Prince's Purple Rain (he thought he was alone). So...the man's got no room to laugh. :-)

Poor Silda Spitzer...the lastest victim in the "stand-by-her-man" PR scheme to make the American public believe that women should be forgiving and should stand there and take any crap her husband dishes out (cause that's what a good little wife does).

Bullshit. She hates his guts and every woman watching her can tell.

Just once...JUST ONCE...I'd love to see one of these women use these press conferences to do what all of us want them to do. In the words of girlfriend, Lisa. "I wish she'd smack his face, call him an asshole and stomp off the stage."

Stand by her man?

More like propped.

She's a prop.

And, I can only hope she was on several valium.

In 1993, Dee Dee Myers made history as the first female White House press secretary. Since then, she's been wondering what would happen if more women were standing in the front of the room.

She just wrote a book about it. Myers' book, "Why Woman Should Rule the World" was just released this month and retails for $25 in hardcover (but you can get it on Amazon.com for $16.50).

I wasn't sure I wanted to invest the time and money in the book (sigh...another on the pile of books I'll get to "some day"). And, to be really honest, the title puts me off. I don't want only women to rule the world -- I want the best people to rule the world. There is absolutely nothing to be gained by pitting the genders against each other. We're different. We handle things differently and we should embrace those differences and -- WORK TOGETHER -- balancing each other out (and making each stronger).

But..then I read this interview. And, I just had to order another book for my reading pile.

Here, an excerpt from the interview about Hillary that rings true (particularly the line about society being unsure of just how much power we want to give to women):

Hillary continues to be controversial. And it isn't just her last name. She has been judged by a different, often harsher standard - in many ways because she's a woman. She's expected to be tough, but not harsh; caring, but not emotional; assertive, but for God's sake, not bitchy. As a society, we're unresolved about just how much power women should have, and Hillary often finds herself on the fault line between competing views. Still, she's proved that women can be serious candidates for president. And whether she wins or loses, nothing will ever be quite the same.

Her Times funny man, Josh West, is going to be a daddy. And, while his wife, Amy, is busy building a baby, Josh has been busy blogging about the entire pregnancy experience -- from the guy's side.

Check out Josh's blog at "Who are You (and What Are You Doing in my Wife?)."

I'm working on the next issue of Her Times and needed to round up some photos of style icons of days of yore for a beauty story we are doing.

Turns out our Erie Times-News Showcase editor, Doug Rieder has quite the stash of entertainment, music and movie publicity photos -- decades worth. And, I have to tell you...that they are organized so well it made my order-loving heart swoon.

Anyway....in the "Sophia Loren" folder I found a photo that stopped me in my tracks. She was, of course, stunningly beautiful, but...in this particular photo she had a body like, well, mine. And other normal women. Seriously...check this out:

You know that by today's standards our beautiful, gorgeous style icon Sophia would not even get called back. She'd be told to lose 20 lbs.

But, seriously...isn't she gorgeous?

Don't you wish this were the standards we were held up to -- instead of the adolescent boys that the fashion designers tell us we should strive for?

If only I wore born in the '40s -- I could've been a supermodel. (sigh).

Today's my 14th wedding anniversary. Fourteen years. 14 years. That's amazing, no?

I know what you're thinking...she can't possibly be old enough to have been married for 14 years. :-) I was a child bride. OK...OK...I was 23, but that's practically a child by today's marrying standards.

We're waaaayyy past the point of exchanging gifts and cards and roses (I mean, it's all coming out of the family budget, so what's the point), but just for grins I decided to find out what the traditional gift is for the 14th wedding anniversary.

Ivory.

Uh...OK. Isn't that just politically incorrect? Isn't it, in fact, illegal?

Apparently so...according to this web site you're supposed to twist the ivory theme to mean ivory-colored items or elephant gift items.

I say...in lieu of some silly ivory knick-knack or elephant painting, we settle for eating like elephants at the local watering hole.

I'm a lover of order and routine, so I've decided to assign myself a topic for a couple of days a week -- Tuesdays are now "I Tried It Tuesdays" where I'll tell you about something I recently tried -- an item, a movie, an activity, etc.

This week, I tried taking my kids, 6 & 4, to the Erie Playhouse Youtheatre's production of "Around the World in 80 Days." It was that or "Horton Hears a Who?" (which is receiving mixed reviews from my mommy friends).

I weighed the cost ($10 for Playhouse tix vs. $$5.75 for a matinee at Tinseltown) and opted for live theater and the chance to give my kids some culture and support the Playhouse.

The skinny: It was a good show, but would've been better if we had been familiar with the story going into it. It took me a while to figure out what was going on & who was who. Most of the actors (mostly kids) were fantastic and ... what a crew -- they must've had 60 kids in the cast -- from teens to kids who couldn't have been more than 5 (they, alone, were worth the price of admission).

Tuesdays are "I Tried It Tuesdays" where I'll tell you about something I recently tried -- an item, a movie, an activity, etc.

I love Oprah and Oprah loves Spanx -- the "undercover body-shaping" underwear that is supposed to give a smooth, contoured look.

Oprah (and other famous ladies) have been talking up Spanx since they hit the market years ago. And, when Oprah speaks, women listen.

I happened to see a rack of Spanx-like undies at the local Big Lots (don't laugh...you know you love to go there, too...it's like a treasure hunt in that store...you just never know what you're going to find). For $6, I figured I'd give the shaping panties a try. I bought a pair like these in the "B" size because my experience with the weight/size charts on the back of pantyhose is that they are out of their ever-loving minds.

the wife will clean the hell out of the house.

My husband was at fishing camp all weekend and I could hardly wait for him to leave so I could clean the whole house and have it STAY THAT WAY until Sunday evening.

No whiskers in the bathroom sink, no toast crumbs on the counter, no jacket hanging on the kitchen chair, no giant muddy work boots to trip over....

I have several friends who are going through divorces right now. Some are amicable, some are nasty, some are bitter, most involve cheating spouses, but all of them are just extremely sad. Regardless of how it ends or how much it needed to end, it has to be really painful for everyone involved.

I mean, even if you hate the jerk and you want his lying, cheating ass out of your house -- if he's the father of your children, there's a serious loss there -- for the spouse and the kids. I imagine anyone would mourn the loss of future they thought they would have (and were cheated out of).

Moms — check out the newest online community for local moms (and dads) to connect, swap advice and share stories and photos — www.ErieMoms.com.

You can simply surf around and see what's going on --- read blogs, discussion, etc. But, you need to register/join the site (it's free, of course) to comment, post your own discussion or join in the conversation.